An Apology
by xXkana-chanXx
Summary: It's after the Chuunin exams, and Neji wants to apologise to Hinata. But an apology doesn't come so easy to the proud genius ninja! Soon he realises saying sorry was the least of worries. Oneshot [NejiXHinata]


**Hiya this is my first fanfic here. I know Neji x Hinata pairing is considered as 'incest' **

**but Hinata is so cute and adorable, I couldn't help pairing her with just everyone!**

**Please, read and review!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and its characters.**

* * *

It was late in the night and the whole house was dark.

Everyone was asleep, that is everyone except a terrified Neji.

As time ticked by, he began to realise what an enormous wrong he has done to Hinata during the Chuunin examinations.

His own cousin. His supposed protégée! He was meant to protect her with his life!!

He sighed inwardly. Neji was really grateful to Naruto for opening his eyes

and setting him free from the darkness he was drowning in, but it also meant

facing your past mistakes and guilt, and he wasn't looking forward to it.

He knew he'd injured Hinata very badly.

Hell, he'd even tried to kill her in the flash of that uncontrollable anger!

Curse his temper!

He shuddered to think what'd have happened if other Jounins didn't stop him then.

He rolled on the bed and buried his face in the pillow.

"This is so not like me…" he said out loud and sighed again. "Hinata-sama…"

He daydreamed a bit while thinking about his little cousin.

The cute little girl who had hidden behind the father's leg had grown so much.

She was still the shy little thing but a very determined and mature one.

Trying so hard, even when she knew it was impossible,

never giving up and go back on your own word…

That is her _nindo_, is it…

Somehow he felt like a small kid who's been whining about the unfairness of the life,

stubbornly refusing to see the possibilities.

In the end, he was only a brat who picked on a girl that he liked,

an incomprehensible psychology that all boys of age between 8 to 12,

- sometimes even expanding to late teens in some cases - seem to possess.

A girl that he liked…

"Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it!"

Neji chanted frustratingly into his pillow.

The first time he had seen her, he thought Hinata was the cutest girl he had ever seen.

Her shy smile, the way she looked at him, everything about her screamed adorable.

Then his father told him that he was born to protect her. That he must protect her with his life.

When Neji heard this, he was overjoyed not even noticing the grim face of his father.

He was truly happy that his life was anyhow connected to his little cousin.

He had to protect her with his life… He was _born_ to do so…!

She was his reason for living… that Hinata-sama was.

And what cruel things did I do to her…?

Neji turned over, groaning loudly, and stared at the ceiling.

The image of Hinata when they were fighting hovered over his eyes.

'I will not go back on my own word,' she said then. 'That is my _nindo_…'

Growling loudly and muffling his hair, he shot out of the bed.

No good will come out of postponing what must be done.

Without even realising that it was well past midnight and that everyone was asleep,

Neji got out of his room and slowly walked down the corridor.

Hinata's room was only three doors away from him.

After the Chuunin examinations,

when all the misunderstandings have cleared between Neji and his uncle,

the head of the clan, Hiashi-sama invited Neji to live in the Main house

with the rest of the family.

At first, Neji thought to refuse him but he too sensed Hiash-sama's

somewhat awkward but genuine effort to mend their relationship,

and couldn't easily thwart his offer.

Then he was given a room in the same corridor as Hinata and Hanabi,

and even received personal trainings from Hiashi-sama himself.

Everything seemed to be going well, except one thing.

He needed to – very much wanted to – apologise to his cousin, but didn't know how!

True, he had reasons to be angry but not good enough to nearly kill the future head of the clan.

Perhaps he should be counting his lucky stars that

the Elders did not decide to punish him for such an act as a Branch house member.

Neji sighed deeply and knocked lightly on Hinata's door.

"Hinata-sama, can I come in?"

No answer.

"Hinata-sama?"

Stupid Neji, she must be sleeping by now!

Mentally hitting his head, he quietly slid the door open.

His cousin was indeed sleeping in one corner of the room.

He was surprised that Hinata's room did not have a bed, like his own,

but instead she slept on a futon.

Stepping quietly like a cat, he went closer and knelt down beside her sleeping face.

She was still breathing quite heavily and winced from time to time.

Slowly, he brushed her fringes away from the brows and placed his hand on her forehead.

Slight fever, but nothing serious.

Then his hand travelled down her face.

Small bruises… he cursed himself soundlessly.

_How could I even think to __spoil such a pretty face?_

His thumb began to draw circles on her cheek.

_To crush such__ a small body…_

He traced her jaw line.

_Pretty, so pretty…_

…..

Hinata protested with a small moan, turning her head to face Neji directly.

"tickles…" she whispered and very slowly opened her eyes.

"hmm… who…?" still heavily laden with sleep, her eyes fell on Neji.

"Ah… Neji-niisan," she said pleasantly and plopped back to her pillow.

Silence ensued for a moment then she shot out of her duvet.

"Huh, Neji-niisan!?"

"Hinata-sama," said Neji calmly.

"Niisan, wha-, what are you doing here?"

"Hinata-sama, there's something I must say before it's too late…"

'_At this time of the night_?' wondered Hinata.

"I," words seemed to be stuck in his throat. _Just say it, idiot!_

"I wanted to," _say you are sorry!_

It was harder than expected, but then he had never apologised to anyone before!

_I am so hopeless_, Neji sighed and inhaled deeply, in front of a very intrigued Hinata.

She had never seen him look so confused and somehow she was enjoying the scene.

_So, even Neji-niisan was a human after all!_

"What is it, niisan?"

"Hinata-sama," he began again. Damn it all, he'll end up saying her name at least hundred times

before he can actually get to the point! _Come on, Neji. Be a man._

"I apologise deeply for the hurt I've done you, Hinata-sama," _finally!_

"Will you… forgive me?"

He felt like someone was clutching hard at his guts.

Now he knew why he had been so afraid to do this.

All along, he was afraid that Hinata won't forgive him,

that she'll end up hating him for the rest of her life.

He couldn't live with that. No, not his little cousin Hinata.

He'd rather be under the wrath of all four Hokages' spectres than that.

He avoided Hinata's all-seeing eyes.

Then he heard a giggle. _Eh?_

And another giggle. When he turned his head side way to look,

Hinata was finding it very hard to suppress the laugh that seems to bubble up inside her.

"What's funny?!" asked Neji irritated.

"But you looked so cute, niisan," said Hinata with a smile.

"I didn't know Neji-niisan could be so cute."

Blushing furiously, Neji nearly shouted.

"Don't say pointless things!" but this only provoked more giggles from her.

"Ah, enough already! So, Hinata-sama, will you forgive me or not?!"

Hinata nearly burst into laughter.

"You look like you'd beat me again if I don't forgive you."

"No, no, Hinata-sama, that's not what I mean, you got it wrong, it's-"

"It's alright already," said Hinata calmly. "I have no grudges against you or your actions.

I'm just very happy that all the misunderstandings have cleared and you came to live with us."

Neji's eyes widened. That's what she was thinking…?

Hinata began to twiddle her fingers and stared at them.

"And also, that you don't hate me anymore…" whispered Hinata.

Neji barely heard what she said but he had well-trained sharp ears.

"Hinata-sama, that's…!" but he couldn't honestly deny that there wasn't a single time he hated her.

He used to hate her indeed. Enough to attempt to kill her!

Only excuse he could come up with was that he is a total fool and a blind.

"It's alright, niisan… I forgive you," she smiled broadly.

Neji was speechless. So many emotions went through him at the moment,

and as usual, he didn't know how to express them.

Happiness, guilt, joy, relief, desperation and

something deep inside that he never wanted to acknowledge.

Desire.

The feeling he'd been trying to ignore all along.

Tried to.

But he was fooling no one.

It was there, the dire longing to be in her presence, to talk to her and see her smile.

The need to hear her voice, smell her vanilla scent, hug her until she is out of breathes.

The simple desire to own her.

Neji had to clench his teeth to stop himself from throwing his arms around Hinata.

_She's forgiven me. __She doesn't hate me. _

But when these sorts of thoughts were passing through his mind,

it took all the discipline he acquired from years of training to not lose his control and act on impulse.

_She's smiling at me.__ She's happy to be with me._

He reasoned that if he did anything strange, right after their reconciliation,

Hinata might just freak out and all will be in vain.

_She's happy with me…_

But he was already reaching his limits. A man could only take so much encouragement,

whether intended or not, from the girl he likes.

_Bother self-discipline, bother propriety!_ he thought.

_I want her in my arms and that's where I will have her! _

Neji was just about to pull Hinata into a rough embrace,

when Hinata suddenly stopped giggling and said,

"Ano, Neji-niisan, it's getting very late. Don't you think you had better sleep now?

Father would want you to be ready for the training early tomorrow morning."

"Ah… S-so, so desu ne, Hinata-sama," Neji had to force out these words.

He felt like an over-extended balloon with a hole.

He could practically feel the adrenaline hissing out of his vein.

Sighing audibly, he got up and said goodnight to a puzzled Hinata.

"Oyasumi nasai, Hinata-sama."

"Hai, Neji-niisan mo oyasumi."

Returning to his room, he told himself, _there's no way I could sleep now, is there?!_

He wondered if he could endure any more of these tensions without seriously cutting short his life-span.


End file.
